The Power of Self-Love

We hear this all our lives: “Be kind. Put others first.” While that cultivates good values in most of us, that also causes us to feel selfish & guilty about self-love.

We know we need to love and take care of ourselves, yet we find it difficult to allow ourselves to experience it fully.

So how can we reclaim the power of self-love—and why is it important to do so today?

Self-love will fuel us to help others.

We’re now in an era where the conversation about self-love is gaining momentum. Sure, we talk about it, but we still don’t practice the self-care tips we read on the internet.

One reason we do that is this: self-love goes against what we were raised to believe. We didn’t have lessons about self-love in school, and some of us didn’t learn it in our homes. 

Instead, we learned to put others first. We’re taught the value of success—how to make money and essentially share our blessings with others.

But unfortunately, we didn’t learn how to keep ourselves fueled for that. This is where the power of self-love comes in.

Giving is good not only for others but also for you. When you give yourself a day to relax, be happy, and think only about yourself, you’ll feel more energized to give back the next day.

That’s also why flight attendants tell you to put your masks on before helping others. You can’t help others if you can’t breathe.

That also rings true for self-love. You can’t give love to others if you don’t have love within you. Even if you feel you still have some to offer, you might be doing it from an empty space.

Pretty soon, you will feel depleted and exhausted. 

Self-love will keep us from beating ourselves up.

Besides the ill-placed guilt about putting yourself first, perfectionism is another factor that could hinder you from reclaiming the power of self-love.

When you constantly strive to surpass yourself, you are likely to be too hard on yourself whenever you make a mistake.

Do you always hear that inner voice that tells you you’re foolish to do this-and-that and you could’ve done things better? That’s the hallmark of perfectionism.

The desire to do everything right all the time is never healthy. It brings nothing but harsh self-criticism.

So what can you do to stop being a perfectionist and start being kind to yourself?

First, acknowledge it’s not healthy for you. Being so hard on yourself because of the tiniest mistake gradually chips away at your sense of self-worth and eventually makes you less happy.

You deserve better than this. Remember, happiness is your birthright, not something you have to earn.

Also, start cultivating self-compassion by getting rid of your inner critic—or at least training it to be kinder to you.

Some perfectionists might not admit it, but they’ve spent years cultivating their inner bully by letting it put them down for every little thing they fail to accomplish.

Self-love or self-compassion isn’t a case of “you either have it, or you don’t.”

Rather, it’s something you can learn and practice over time until it becomes second nature. 

Start cultivating self-love by listening to yourself.

Of all the tips about practicing self-care or self-love, the best tip is this: listen to yourself. 

Paying attention to how you internally talk to yourself is vital for fostering an intimate feeling of self-love.

How do you talk to yourself after making a mistake or noticing a minor flaw in what you’ve done? Do you insult yourself, or do you use an understanding tone? How does your inner voice make you feel inside?

Taking note of whether you have a harsh inner voice (or inner bully) is crucial. It is the first step to quietly subduing it and eventually softening it.

Another way to train this inner voice to be kinder is through journaling.

Write a letter to yourself from the perspective of one of your compassionate friends or the kind friend that you have been to others.

Doing so will help you rephrase how your inner voice talks. 

Listening to yourself also helps you be more aware of what you need. When you’re stressed or emotional, ask yourself, “What do I need?”

That’s a good way to foster goodwill toward yourself.

Maybe, all you need for the moment is a long, relaxing bath or a quiet time alone at home to catch up on your reading and think about nothing but your own wellness.

Self-Love Overflow is here for you.

Prioritizing yourself can be a struggle, but we’re here for you.

If you need a boost to start your journey of loving yourself and putting yourself first often, you can count on us to guide you.

We have tons of materials to help you find your way to self-love overflow! Get in touch.